Grind My Gears – Fucked

Summer is nearly wrapped up over here so it’s time to get right back into the miserable weather, miserable conversation and general misery of being in a Northern part of the world. Fuck the tanned people and their day drinking, fuck the sweaty patch on the small of your back, fuck the tourists who stop walking every two seconds on the street. It’s high time for the grey, grim and gruesome to rear it’s resentful head. This weeks entry into Grind My Gears might just be the most obtuse and vehemently bleak thing you’ll hear the rest of this summer. I love that I get to write this next bit.

Get Fucked.

Like the last entry into the Grind Gallery, Fucked is a relatively fresh body of work with a ridiculous amount of music on offer already. Eighteen months and umpteen digital releases later, the one man project has dipped his gears into the muck of every area of grind that this article has covered thus far. There’s maybe not as much gore as I’d like, but everything else has equal and unequivocally ruthless representation. I’m not going to start at the beginning and I’m sure as fuck not going to cover every individual release, but here’s where I think Fucked gets it 100% right.

Of the first four releases (Void 14), it’s the fourth entry that has the best bursts of viciously fun grind. 1 and 2 are sludgy and full of toilet bowl low vocals, 3 is mechanical and just blasts constantly before rushing to a close, but 4 is the tits. At this point, Fucked operate in the 30-40 second tracks and “GLITCH” is the pinnacle of these feverish attacks. The drum machine and guitar production on this particular release works, even when the boppy Soulfly groove comes out of nowhere. It’s dangerous but fun, like a girlfriend who wants to tie you up and maybe even cut you a bit, but you trust her. The change in sounds and production values over the course of these releases is what helps keeps it fresh. Always advancing, never repeating.

Now, I’m not one to judge anyone’s individual tastes (I’m a grind, horror and football fan so what do I know) but anime and grind seem to have an incredibly intimate relationship. But whatever, let’s just call it an unceonventional love story. The 57 tracks (yup) on CHRONICLES OF THE GRINDING HOME CLUB range from one second to one minute long and a quick look at the artwork should let you know what’s going on. It’s noisegrind with cartoon soundbites. It’s childish, impish and ridiculous. It’s also still really good fun. Thankfully, it’s over before too long and the attempt is wholly improved upon on the Izumi release. More of the same aesthetic but with actual powerviolence and grinding, not just fucking endless anime anecdotes and five seconds of d-beating. “Pure Illusion” is more of the same unstable, teenage wet dream mayhem but in an eight minute format; if the members of Agoraphobic Nosebleed read hentai instead of Palahnuik… you get the picture. This will probably end up most people’s favourite Fucked track with it’s big booming riff and last few seconds on Earth screams.

It’s not all fun and games however. Some of the Fucked releases are just that. Fucked. There’s some devastating and crushing grind violence behind the gimmicks and multiple releases. Anyone reading this column and interested in the likes of mothmother and Throat Breach will be instantly drawn to the blown out guitars and distorted vocals that bludgeon on the Shit House EP. The most recent offering from the one man in charge, these are four tracks which make me want to shit myself in public and just fucking own it. The beating is so filthy that it’s more than likely you’ll find yourself aroused, even with your bloody nose and burst eardrum. Shameful but sexy. “The Mainline Scab” is crusty, sludgy and overdriven to the point of no return, only pulling back to let the track bleed out into a new personal favourite. “Unforgiving Hand” sounds like the sorry state of a chronic masturbator and cranks out at roughly the same pace as my personal best personal time. Disgusting huh? These are the kind of thoughts I’m left with after an evening in the company of Fucked. Don’t pass over the Church Burner EP either because it’s utter carnage too. I just forgot about it ’til right now is all.

If you’re into any weird kind of sex stuff then play any of this for you and/or your partner(s). There’s a band called Basement Torture Killings but they don’t sound half as genuine as this. If there was any real reason for music to come branded with a Parental Advisory sticker then this is it because Fucked both stimulates and encourages filthy behaviour and rotten acts. Why do you think I love it so much? Again, get Fucked.

We are the death of the party. We are the life of the funeral