At the end of an exciting gameweek we’ve seen quite a few changes; a few dark horses shooting right up the rankings and some kings deposed. As the title suggests, it was a good day to have Manchester United striker Wayne Rooney as your captain – scoring double on a huge 22 points. In fact, it was a good week to play several players from either Manchester team, but we’ll get on to that. First up:


Gameweek 3 Dillinger 79 – 42 Kirellah
Gameweek 3 WBF Flames FC 42 – 50 Langland Utd
Gameweek 3 Hell Yeah 74 – 50 The Monolith FC
Gameweek 3 Human Abstract XI 83 – 32 Vanpersieandfriends
Gameweek 3 Triangle united 38 – 22 The Wankahoozanes
Gameweek 3 StrictlyComeGyancing 75 – 72 Orsaeth United
Gameweek 3 Average 57 – 22 WE HATE LEEDS

Dillinger (Ben L) vs. Kirellah (Erik H)

One of the week’s outside successes came from Ben’s ‘Escapees’ – he didn’t even name Rooney in his squad, but a goal and an assist from captain Charlie Adam and Frank Lampard, and a rare brace from Leon Best, backed by clean sheets from three of the backline, and no fewer than three man of the match performances. Unfortunately for Erik, his American contingent of Tim Howard’s magnificent run of saves – including a penalty – and Clint Dempsey’s late goal weren’t enough and Ben sealed victory.

WBF Flames FC (Tyler H) vs. Langland United (Craig T)

De Gea once again came up with the goods for WBF Flames, saving a Robin Van Persie penalty. Forward Sergio Aguero, midfielder Clint Dempsey and defender Jose Boswinga all netted too, but despite an ineffectual performance from Langland’s captain Chris Samba, vice-captain Rooney’s hat-trick, assist and two-point bonus combined with some above-par playing all round to give Craig the edge. A close one to be sure.

Hell Yeah (Rafael R) vs. The Monolith FC (Chris G)

I too neglected to name Rooney my captain, but it mattered more for me as his were the only goals scored by The Monolith. Only two clean sheets were of note, leaving Rafael to storm ahead with seven goals – four alone courtesy of Edin Dzeko – and three assists, along with an all round good show from his side to roundly whup me. Boourns.

Human Abstract XI (Rahul M) vs. Vanpersieandfriends (Dan S)

Despite opening his account, the titular Robin van Persie of Vanpersieandfriends also failed to convert a penalty, and with no other scores of note, Rahul – this week’s highest scorer – demolished thanks to captain Rooney and further goals from Nani and Charlie Adam, and a clean sheet from Robert Huth.

Triangle United (Jaime G) vs. The Wankahoozanes (Tree Beard)

Hot defensive pick Jose Boswinga and Sergio Aguero provided the goals for Triangle United, with not a lot else going on, but it ws more than enough to down The Wankahoozanes who managed just one goal, one assist and a clean sheet for their efforts.

StrictlyComeGyancing (Karl N) vs. Orsaeth United (Kevin Z)

Football newbie Kevin had a brilliant week with a goal apiece from young Danny Welbeck, Charlie Adam and Jordan Henderson, as well as a brilliant round of clean sheets from the defence and goalie Asmir Begovic, but he was incredibly unfortunate to be pipped by three points by Karl thanks to – you guessed it – captain Rooney and a great showing from goalie Ali Al-Habsi. Unlucky Orsaeth!

Average vs. WE HATE LEEDS (Jon W)

The average score was tough this week, with so many across the board defaulting to an on-form Wayne Rooney as their captain, and it downed yet another of us. Jon revamped his injury-prone team from last week, but only captain Robin van Persie provided any goals.

This leaves us with the table as follows:

+- # Team W D L + Pts
1 Human Abstract XI 3 0 0 168 9
2 Triangle united 3 0 0 159 9
3 Hell Yeah 3 0 0 156 9
4 StrictlyComeGyancing 2 0 1 180 6
5 WBF Flames FC 2 0 1 158 6
6 Langland Utd 2 0 1 146 6
7 Average 2 0 1 145 6
8 The Monolith FC 2 0 1 141 6
9 Dillinger 1 0 2 139 3
10 Vanpersieandfriends 1 0 2 123 3
11 Orsaeth United 0 0 3 134 0
12 Kirellah 0 0 3 99 0
13 The Wankahoozanes 0 0 3 85 0
14 WE HATE LEEDS 0 0 3 71 0

The fixtures for the next gameweek are as follows:

The Monolith FC v WBF Flames FC
Langland Utd v Dillinger
Kirellah v Average
WE HATE LEEDS v StrictlyComeGyancing
Orsaeth United v Triangle united
The Wankahoozanes v Human Abstract XI
Vanpersieandfriends v Hell Yeah


Two new entries this week, including Justin S and his Waxing Gibbons who took the top spot. We’re now up to eighteen players in classic, and it’s hotting up! Lots of people dropped places thanks to this, but it was pleasing to see Dillinger and Orsaeth making massive strides to increase the competition.

# Team Manager GW TOT
1 Waxing Gibbons Justin S 83 189
2 StrictlyComeGyancing Karl N 79 180
3 Human Abstract XI Rahul M 83 168
4 Triangle united Jaime G 38 159
5 WBF Flames FC Tyler H 42 158
6 Hell Yeah Rafael R 74 156
7 JFC FC Graham C 57 156
8 Langland Utd Craig T 50 146
9 The Monolith FC Chris G 50 141
10 Gary Glitter’s U16s Chris M 31 141
11 Dillinger Ben L 79 139
12 Orsaeth United Kevin Z 72 134
13 Youwangedmyship Steve B 60 133
14 #Winning Will W 53 130
15 Vanpersieandfriends Dan S 32 123
16 Los Increibles Luis T 36 92
17 The Wankahoozanes Tree Beard 38 85
18 WE HATE LEEDS Jon W 34 71

That’s all for Gameweek 3. If this sounds like fun to you, you can still enter the classic league by going here, signing up and entering the following code in the league section: 425145-118189

The Premier League is now taking a break for players on international duty, so Gameweek 4 begins the week after next, with changes to your team allowed up until 11:30am GMT on September 10th.

See you in a couple of weeks!

– CG


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