Grind My Gears – Summer Sludgin’ (It Happened So Blast)

At this point, it might seem like I’m trying to alienate readers with these truly awful titles for Grind My Gears features. But by the greater grace of grind, the summer months have been wildly busy for extreme music. For the most part, I’ve ignored the bigger releases and instead been dwelling in the bogs of Bandcamp tags – it’s 2018, if you’re not checking Bandcamp regularly for new music you’re a narc. Below you will find a slew of grind catering to all of my particular tastes. It might not be the grind you desire or the grind you need, but it’s the grind you’re gonna get. And yes, I talk about the new Pig Destroyer. Onward.

The Part Where I Talk About The New Pig Destroyer

So, “Army of Cops” was a bit of a shocker. Certainly not the all-out explosion of fury and blasting violence that many of us were expecting. And that’s okay. Who are we to call out one of the few colossal names in grindcore? One track does not make or break a record and with “The Torture Fields” debuting this week, we get a good look at the new Pig Destroyer lineup in grinding, scything action. Charmingly familiar yet revitalised and sharp, this track should decimate the doubters in the typically violent fashion we have come to admire the band for.

(our very own Mark Valentino has photos in this!)

Without being an expert on any musical instrument (or competent, if we’re dropping the harsh truths), I think Adam Jarvis is one of the finest extreme metal percussionists around. The whipping and snapping of Scott Hull riffs must be a shitemare to work around, but Jarvis rolls and kicks and smashes his way right the fuck through “The Torture Fields”. The twisted tale spat out by JR Hayes slithers around the chopping drums and strings and, as always, is completely soaked in a combination of vitriol and untethered vitality; the only kind appropriate for a gnarled, gnasher of a track like this. It’s a great Pig Destroyer song, basically. Let’s swallow our indifference to the first single and finally get on board that hype train. It’s been six fucking years, we’re ready now thank you. Do you hate this as well? Then you’re a jerk. Do you love this? Probably still a jerk, but at least we agree on something

Fucked Continue To Fuck

It hasn’t been that long since the right honourable Fucked has graced the pages of Heavy Blog but I have a grind boner for the terrifying, outrageous stylings of this particular act. The Myrtle Beach grind beast rears its ugly head yet again, eschewing piss and shit for digital terror on this month’s disgusting blast of nightmarish noise. If you’re in the market for some real loud shit to torture your neighbours with, this is it. Synthetic Organic Impedance is the audio equivalent of forcing said neighbours into a Jigsaw trap. One where the parameters have been rigged to ensure maximum carnage and zero chance of escape.

 

This is the most complete and concise outpouring of grindcore to be released under this moniker yet. The big dirty riff that kicks off “Deeper Order” could be ripped right out of a Trap Them B-side, while doom, sludge, and noise all converge through the rest of the EP (all eight minutes of it). While brief, the pummeling drum machine loops and feedback screeches ensure Synthetic Organic Impedance joins an already impressive catalogue of savage music. The blackened hellhole that rounds off the closing title track just hits that sweet spot between pain and bliss between the ears. It might not be dynamic or textured, whatsoever, but I love it. I know a few of you do too. You dirty, dirty individuals.

Quit Pickin’ Your Brutal Sphincter

Rounding this week off is Belgium’s Brutal Sphincter. Yep. We’re dipping into gore/pornogrind for the first time – what took me so long, you might ask? Well, most of it is fucking shit. Not this lot, no sirree. Analhu Akbar (yep) is the brand new record from the toilet bowl dwelling Belgians and it is legitimately some of the most fun and ferocious shit gargling to ever grace thine ears. It’s completely over-the-top and peppered with some truly shitty track titles, but it grinds pretty fucking hard and has the best closing track I’ve heard in a long time. If you thought I was testing the boundaries of this feature with Fucked then realistically you’ve seen fuck all yet.

 

This is several layers outside of the usual goregrind remit. It doesn’t sound like tin cans in a washing machine, for one. The production is thick and crushing, yet not nearly as brutal as the slams and grooves that drop like a bag of hastily chopped up limbs on an unsuspecting baby’s face. “We’re All Scum” and “Prohibit Anime” might be the two tracks I go back to most, but neither of them are as unique and, bizarrely, cute as the closing call to arms “Goregrind Number One”. It’s the closest thing to a stadium rock anthem as any band operating in the shit-crusted world of gore and porno could ever muster. It’s completely batshit and shouldn’t work, yet it does. For every high brow grind fan that thinks Trumpeting Ecstasy is the be all and end all of grind, there’s a little voice in the back of their head telling them to listen to this. They should listen to that little voice. I did. I turned out just fine.

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