Jimmy R. | Alkahest
Jimmy is a mild-mannered college student from Pikeville, KY. When not busy being a file clerk for an insurance agency, he's playing Pokemon and running this website.

Chris G. | Disinformasiya
Since being outed as a Russian spy and deported, Chris now lives in London, working undercover as an administrative assistant in the office furniture industry. As if that wasn't excitement enough, he also writes to satiate his incredible arrogance that anyone gives a damn about his opinions.

Mitch W. | Dethcaek
Mitch is a high school student hailing from Houston, Texas who hates everything.

Michael K. | Gein
Michael is an 18 year old residing in the shit hole called Houston, Texas. He hates black metal.

Joseph B. | Yogg Saron
Joseph is a budding music columnist tired of writing about your favorite Sc3n3 bands. Between practicing guitar, trolling Metalsucks, and World of Warcraft, the carpal tunnel will be strong with this one...

Paul M. | Uncle Muscles
Paul hails from the mountains of Asheville, North Carolina and he enjoys listening to Dave Brubeck and Between The Buried And Me when he's not selling his plasma for gas money.

Dan A. | Dormition
Dan is a graphic artist born and raised in Long Island whose fascinated with ink blots, tattoos and heavy tunes.

Matthew S. | Foundry
Born in Chicago, Matthew likes pasta and plays guitar. He's also into indie music.

Peter C. | Harlequin Crest
Peter is from Mesa, Arizona and is a recovering Diablo 2 addict with a love-hate relationship with Politics. You can find him shamelessly headbanging while driving, bicycling, or walking his dogs.